#128
by Kirk Franklin
March 26, 1980
Van Halen
Women and Children First
Genre: Heavy Metal
Allen’s Rating: 4 out of 5
Kirk’s ultimate rating: 4 out of 5
First two songs: 5/5
The rest: 2.5/5
Reviewed by Kirk Franklin
"Have you seen Junior's grades?"
Some personal history with this one. I was in high school and a huge Beatles fan when this album came out, and my kid brother turned me on to contemporary rock and this album is one of the first ones I remember branching out (and rocking out) to.
The first two songs are monster classics and always on my best-of list. I hadn't listened to the rest of the songs in years, if ever, before listening to them for this review.
Songs linked to Van Halen News Desk for additional insight and David Lee Roth's hand-written lyrics.
Side One
"And the Cradle Will Rock..." (5/5) Absolute stunner from the first second (which is actually electric piano, not guitar). All the best things about Van Halen. Crushing rock, awesome guitar work from Eddie Van Halen, David Lee Roth histrionics, and humor.
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/and-the-cradle-will-rock/
"Everybody Wants Some!!" (5/5) One of the most swaggering songs on their catalog. Thunderous tribal drums, monster guitar riffs. May contain sexual content. Also featured in the awesome claymation scene in Better Off Dead. (I was an English major so that extra exclamation point kills me, but that's the official punctuation.)
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/everybody-wants-some/
"Fools" (2/5) Two different intros, one sounding like they're pretending to be a blues band. It's a generic Van Halen song: Eddie Van Halen guitar wanking, high school rebel lyrics, David Lee Roth guttural vocalizations, harmonies. "Dave called music very personal in terms of lyric content, and says it comes from the heart – or some part of the body."
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/fools/
"Romeo Delight" (3/5) Sweet guitar riff. Prototypical Van Halen song, good version. Much catchier than "Fools." This would be the best song by many bands but it's 2nd tier Van Halen.
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/romeo-delight/
Side Two
"Tora! Tora!" (1/5) Before listening: is this about bulls or the attack on Pearl Harbor? After: Motorcycles and "Dazed and Confused" lite with screaming.
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/tora-tora/
"Loss of Control" (2/5) Gimmicky CB radio intro. A lot of the song is people singing "lost control lost control lost control." "You know how late on a Saturday night you feel like turning everything on to 78 and blowing out all your fuses and going, 'Aaaaaaaah.' Well, that's what this song does."
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/loss-of-control/
"Take Your Whiskey Home" (3/5) Nice acoustic work with Van Halen pretending to be a blues band before rocking out. Nice but boring.
"Could This Be Magic?" (3/5) Not the Barry Manilow song. Some really pretty acoustic guitar work. Like those weird Beatles songs where they pretend they're in the '30s. Contains the only female backing vocal ever recorded for a Van Halen song, by Nicolette Larson. Source of the album title.
"And I see lonely ships upon the water
(Better save the women and children first)
Sail away with someone's daughter
(Better save the women and children first)"
http://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/could-this-be-magic/
"In a Simple Rhyme" (3/5) Another pretty acoustic intro going into rock. Generic Van Halen at its best. Some really cool hooks. When I'm paying attention I really like the song but it's easy to get distracted.
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/in-a-simple-rhyme/
"Growth" (2/5) A chunky little instrumental that's a hidden track after "In a Simple Rhyme." I wasn't expecting Beatles influences but the end of "In a Simple Rhyme" followed by this is kind of like "The End" followed by "Her Majesty" on Abbey Road. Except nowhere near as good.
https://www.vhnd.com/women-and-children-first/growth/
https://open.spotify.com/album/7fRy246Xzz3gez6stjTgKk?si=9FOkJ_iHRKSDHotAX9oDtg
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YDsKGyu0F98
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