Cliff Richard - Wired for Sound
#406
By Julia Talbot
September 11, 1981
Wired for Sound
Cliff Richards
Genre: Forgettable (British) soft rock
Allen’s Rating: 2.5 out of 5
Julia’s Rating: 1.5 out 5
Highlights: It ended eventually.
Well, certainly worse things than “Wired for Sound” have happened on September 11, so there is that. Other than that, it’s a forgettable listen. If you love Perry Como, string background accompaniments that build to a crescendo for no particular reason, soft rock, the occasional cover of a harder rock song and long walks in the moonlight, this could be the greatest album ever for you. Might I add, it’s BRITISH! I’d love to say that listening to this album explained Brexit to me, but it didn’t. Mostly I tuned it out until my boyfriend asked what was the crap I was listening to… then I turned it off.
Cliff Richards is one of those guys who has been around forever. He was born in British India and moved back to England when he was eight or so. He is credited with having the first “authentic” rock and roll song produced in England – whatever that means. According to Wikipedia, John Lennon said that before Cliff Richards (and his band at the time, the Shadows), there was nothing worth listening to in Britain. Strong words, John, strong words - also wrong. There was plenty to listen to prior to Cliff Richards – skiffle for one. In 1958, Paul McCartney and the Quarrymen had their first gig, and let’s be honest, it’s not like Cliff Richards was straying too far from the mainstream of the day or pushing any envelopes whatsoever. I was not one bit surprised to learn that somewhere during his long, long career, Cliff ventured into the realm of Christian rock, where his music did not dispel one stereotype about that genre either. This is a guy who has made a career out of not rocking any boats. Rocking…. Get it? Ha.
To be honest, I feel I have listened to enough mediocre music from 1981, to make me start questioning the role of white, male privilege in the music industry, at least in Britain if not everywhere. It isn’t like this album (or the others I’ve listened to or read reviews of) is particularly awful or that the musicians are truly terrible. Sure, I hate this album’s steadfast commitment to soft rock but in the end, this and the other records I have listened to/reviewed/read reviews of have mostly been carefully produced, employed the talents of solid musicians, and in many cases evidence that care and thought was given, and yet they are still… a waste of my earballs. God help me if I am struck deaf and this album is the last thing I listened to. It all adds up to my wondering that if these guys hadn’t enjoyed some sort of privilege would they/their music been given any bandwidth at all. In the case of “Wired for Sound” I am not sure if it is deserved. It begs the question that if Cliff Richards hadn’t been a white guy, would have he scored this album in particular, but really, his whole fucking career?
Of course, every musician with any sort of marketability is at some point exploited. There is a village of people depending on their production and their product being marketable – but is that really a recipe for great music? To add insult to injury, this guy has released a whopping 52 albums starting in 1959 with the most recent being in 2020. Of these, 19 of his songs made it onto the US Billboard chart and three made it to the top ten (never higher than six). He fared much better in Britain with 14 number one hits – much more impressive but still – 52 albums over 61 years, that’s a long time to get hits. I’ll give him points to for showing up, but lots of bad or mediocre things have staying power… like G.W. Bush (and his family) or those orange circus peanut candies. At some point, just because you keep showing up doesn’t mean you are good at anything besides showing up. All that being said, I do need to mention that this album peaked at number four on the British charts and stayed on the charts for a total of 25 weeks. Ultimately, over a million copies were sold worldwide. There is no accounting for taste. Prince only had one hit single on the British charts and he was actually talented.
Ever the diligent reviewer, I did listen to this album not once, but three times and let me save you the trouble. If you looooove soft rock, I suppose this is great, if not mindless background music for doing shit with a glue gun, putting glitter on stuff, or maybe reorganizing your underwear drawer, but I implore you: do not listen closely lest you be as underwhelmed as I was by some seriously random lyrics. For example:
“Tomorrow never comes when you are looking forward to it
You try so hard to live the day your way
But what a life if you could live the way you want it
You tried it once before but it didn't work out
You know you need someone to bring out the best in you”
There is so much wrong with the whole thought structure behind this, I need to lie down.
On the plus side of things, there are a few covers on this album. Check out Wreckless Eric’s “Broken Doll”, Shep and the Limelight’s “Daddy’s Home”, and in the 2001 re-release, “Shakin’ All Over”. Those are sort of bearable. In the meantime, I’ll be taking a bubble bath to wash the gooey sentimentality of this whole album off my soul.
https://open.spotify.com/album/0mWgmgROMsjSvvNydhSj8B?si=eljz8WywS_WMyjgohz3k8g
