The 1982 Listening Post - Sparks - Angst in My Pants

 Reviewed by Stephen Romone Lewis

Released: March 29 1982 Sparks Angst In My Pants Genre: Pop New Wave Allen’s Rating: 4.5 out of 5 Stephen’s Rating: 5 out of 5 Highlights: Angst In My Pants I Predict Mickey Mouse Moustache Instant Weight Loss Sparks tickle my soul. So, it hurts me existentially that they are not embraced by everyone who loves pop. I understand why reggae fans and polka fans don’t flock to them, but if you’ve ever tapped your foot, even accidentally, to John Mayor, Nickleback or Beyonce WHY DO YOU SHUN SPARKS!? I have 3 theories. One: Russell Mael’s squeally, multi-octave voice is an acquired taste (a musical anchovy). Two: You are turned off by the lyrics. I guess that for SOME people only vague, lovey-dovey pap passes as pop and all other subject matters are instantly regarded as novelty. Three: you’re a fucking moron. Angst in My Pants is eleven tracks of pure, ass-wiggling pop. Yes the lyrical subjects are unconventional: the joy of having a moustache, a sentient cigarette, Tarzan and Jane, Sherlock Holmes, but every tune will stick in your head. Haven’t you heard enough dopey love songs? Come on give a tune about the world’s worst Nostradamus impersonator (Nostra-dumb-ass) a chance. “I predict, Lassie will prove that Elvis and her had a fleeting affair.” One soul tickling thing about Sparks is that they are still actively working and creating. The world seems slightly less post-apocalyptic when I see people a decade older than me putting out inventive and addictive music. It gives me hope. This year Russell and Ron Mael’s (Sparks) film musical, Annette, premiered at Cannes, and their album A Steady Drip, Drip Drip was the only good thing about 2020 besides not having to leave my house. They have 26 albums dating back to 1971 including a collaboration with Franz Ferdinand. I don’t love each one, their work with Giorgio Moroder leaves me cold, but when they set out to write a pop tune, I can’t unhear it (in a good way). Haters, give them a chance. And LONG LIVE ROCK-N-ROLL! Memo to ukulele players: “Moustache” is super easy and fun to play. Only 3 chords C, F and G.

The 1981 Listening Post - Sparks - Whomp That Sucker

 Sparks - Whomp That Sucker

#347

By Timothy Sprague

Sparks

Whomp That Sucker

Genre: Sparks

Allen’s Rating: 3 out of 5

Tim’s Rating: 4.5/5

There are two things required in order to appreciate Sparks… One, a sense of humor.  And two, a high tolerance for multi-tracked falsetto vocals.  Now, before anyone starts making the usual Queen comparisons, let it be said that the first album by Halfnelson, re-released a year later under the new name Sparks, was released in 1971, while Queen’s first album did not hit record stores until 1973.  Halfnelson/Sparks was produced by wunderkind Todd Rundgren and launched brothers Ron and Russell Mael to European stardom and relative obscurity in the US until New Wave came along and finally provided the kind of American audience that would enjoy their quirky sound and offbeat lyrics.  One of those kids was me. 

Whomp That Sucker starts out funny from the first time you lay eyes on the album cover.  Older brother Ron has knocked out his pretty boy kid brother Russell in the boxing ring and stands with his arms raised in triumph.  And both of them look like geeks.  The album is a return to the guitar-driven glam sound that made them a hit in England and Europe in the 70s, after recording two synth-heavy albums produced by Giorgio Moroder that horrified some longtime fans and delighted a new generation of younger listeners.  Tips For Teens comes first, with Sparks imparting their wisdom to “turn up the music and say you’re too sick to go to work.”  This song epitomizes my discovery of New Wave music in 1981 as an impressionable 13-year-old. Somebody had it on a compilation album from the time and it sounded dirty because “tips” kind of sounds like “tits.”  Funny Face comes next, another classic Sparks tune that is still making me laugh as I write this review and listen to the album.  Russell sounds like he is doing a duet with himself while also providing the greek chorus backing vocals to a story about a man so handsome he can’t stand it and jumps off a bridge to injure his beautiful face on purpose.  “I got my one request… I got my Funny Face.”  The next track, Where’s My Girl, appears to be about a stalker tracking down his “girl.”  Humorous but actually quite creepy when you pay close attention to the lyrics.  “Where’s my girl… I’m calmer now… I want her now” Russell pleads.  The dancey tempos and high energy arrangements continue with Upstairs, about what goes on between our ears, and I Married a Martian to close out side one. The latter is by far the most overtly silly song that Ron Mael has ever written in this reviewer’s estimation.  Even if you have not heard the song, you get the idea.  “I married a Martian, and boy am I sorry…”. To this day, it never ceases to bring a smile to my face. 

On to side two and the chuckles continue with The Willys, also a rather silly tune.  “We know whatcha got boy… they call it the Willyyyyyyyysss…”. If all this sounds like novelty music I won’t argue with you but so what?  Novelty is one of my favorite qualities in life. And if you can dance to it, even better.  Don’t Shoot Me is the next track and not really one of Sparks’ better efforts but does have some tasty low end synth riffs that are notable.  Suzie Safety follows, also just kind of lighthearted filler but presents another humorous character from Ron Mael’s imagination who won’t stop nagging everybody to follow safety rules.  Ron digs in to his love of Operetta style songwriting and obsession with icey European women once again on the next song, That’s Not Nastassia.  (This one sounds exactly like it could have been on Halfnelson or their second album A Woofer In Tweeter’s Clothing.) Wacky Women closes out the album on a note of crazed abandon, celebrating all the crazy chicks in the world.  It’s a great ride from start to finish.  

One of the things I love about Sparks is that their style and lyrical content have been consistent for fifty years.  You can mix songs from this album with all of their previous and subsequent work, including their 2020 release A Steady Drip Drip Drip, and it all sounds like one big long album.  Ron and Russell create music about the same obsessions they had when they left Los Angeles in the late 60s to try their luck at being a rock band in England.  The yearning to be admired by women, the insecurity, the dorkiness, the crazy characters, the zaniness, the intellectual references and the just overall goddamn joie de vivre persist through it all.  Ronald Mael has written a catalog of songs that rivals (some, like me, might say eclipses) any of the great songwriting masters over the years, from Irving Berlin to Paul Simon to Woody Guthrie to Burt Bacharach to George M. Cohan to Weber & Rice, Gilbert & Sullivan, Lennon & McCartney or Rodgers & Hammerstein. I am probably being hyperbolic about The Beatles, but the man is prolific and we are better off as a society because of it.  I don’t want to live in a world without Sparks.  

No Listening Post review is complete without personal anecdotes so here are a couple of mine about Sparks. I have been lucky enough to see them multiple times in Los Angeles, usually the only American city where they have played in over 20 years.  They tour in Europe but only play shows in their hometown rather than tour the rest of the US, except for the Two Hands One Mouth tour with no backing band in 2013.  The first time they had played in the US since the 80s was at the Key Club on the Sunset Strip in November, 1998. (The club was previously Gazzarri’s of hair metal fame.) So, my ex-wife is a huuuuuuuuge Morrissey fan, ok?  We walk into the club and who is standing right there by the entrance chatting with a friend but Moz himself!  Of course, she starts hyperventilating and sweating profusely until she gathered herself at the bar for a minute.  I encouraged her to get up the courage to say something to Morrissey and she sheepishly walked up and said, “It’s nice to meet you,” and he nodded obligingly. Morrissey is very open about the huge influence Sparks were for him.  I notice it every time I hear him or The Smiths.  On the way out, we also spotted Weird Al Yankovich!  Obviously a huge Sparks fan, right? After the show, I brought my lp copies of Kimono My House and Angst In My Pants to the in-store appearance at the famous and now defunct Tower Records on Sunset.  Ron was very congenial but Russell seemed bothered and just signed my records and scowled. One would think it would be the other way around, but no.  Another time I saw them at the Fonda Theatre In Hollywood and The Music Geek from Beat the Geeks was in the audience, which also made perfect sense.   Because geeks love Sparks! The live presentation of their musical The Seduction of Ingmar Bergman at the outdoor Ford Amphitheatre in 2011 was also especially rememberable.  

Thanks for letting me review this album and thanks for reading.

https://open.spotify.com/album/3x0j7lxTq1i4VHMBXFg94B?si=cAHjSj1ZTVq75PDwHrp4uQ

The 1980 Listening Post - Sparks - Terminal Jive

Sparks - Terminal Jive

#26

Reviewed by Lori Alley

January 28 1980

Sparks

Terminal Jive

Genre: Roller Rink Freeskate

Lori’s Rating: 2 Out of 5

Allen’s Rating: 2 Out of 5

Lori’s Highlights:

Noisy Boys

Allen’s Highlights:

The Greatest Show On Earth

By Lori Alley:

I would give this album a higher rating if I could confirm that it's a joke I just don't get. I can't tell if they are trying to be a parody of an 80s band or if it's an authentic reflection of the times.  I only gave it a 2 because it really serves best as a sociological reminder of the 80s, and might be locked into a time capsule for future generations as a perfect example of 80s music.  It's SO inclusively referential of every decade that has come before and apparently since these guys have been around since the late 60's they've managed to drag everything with them along the way. Noisy Boys is danceable and sort of okay, but the rest includes what I can only describe as an anthem for sexually confused adolescent boys with such songs as "Just Because You Love Me (baby baby give it to me)" and an "instrumental." The instrumental begs the question, "why bother?"  It has a slightly prog rock sound combined with a Spinal Tap good naturedness, with Gary Numan thrown in as well.  But really it's more reminiscent of workout videos and rollerskating from the 80's than anything else, and would be useful music for torturing confessions out of captive terrorists.  Maybe I'll listen to this again when I'm not being held hostage by a pandemic and find it to be less infuriating.

https://open.spotify.com/album/4VLxLHCbKBhtsM09X9gMMj?si=4c43fgHmTtSbXE1PUmVDvQ

The 1986 Listening Post - Sparks - Music That You Can Dance To

Sparks - Music That You Can Dance To

#408/2087

September 1986

Sparks

Music That You Can Dance To

Genre: Dance Pop

2 out of 5

Requisite 80s cover:

“Fingertips” by Stevie Wonder

I loved Sparks. 

For about 3 months. And not in consecutive order. For a few weeks at a time. 

Mostly during Angst in My Pants. Because they were cheeky. They didn’t take themselves too seriously. And I went back into the catalog to discover that they were funnier than that and also glam prog and really edgy. 

And then they discovered drum machines and that exposed their limitations through that freedom to be autonomous and their music sounded canned and boring. 

So, We are left with this. Sometimes it borders on actually trying to achieve something bigger than themselves “Rosebud” (which actually bites too hard on “Life During Wartime” by Talking Heads to be ignored)  or “Fingertips” and the other times it’s hackneyed and aims too low (“Armies of the Night”.) A lot of this record would be better off withOUT Russell. I know that’s weird but it feels like Ron is feeling his dance floor oats and the words are detracting. 

This is the kind of Eurotrash that gets you tossed off the list, Maels. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/music-that-you-can-dance-to/507971212

The 1984 Listening Post - Sparks - Pulling Rabbits Out of a Hat

Sparks - Pulling Rabbits Out of a Hat

#137

June 1 1984

Sparks

Pulling Rabbits Out of a Hat

3.25 out of 5

Highlights:

Pulling Rabbits Out of a Hat

Pretending to Be Drunk

I love the lead single off this record but I am fully aware that it’s not a very good song, considering their track record. It’s an attempt to continue their dance success of In Outer Space but it suffers from one of the things I hate that Queen would often do: Find a phrase, make that the chorus, write a song around it that isn’t all that interesting or really well informed by the any subject. Sometimes Sparks could pull this off (“Angst in My Pants”) but here it borders on annoying. That said, I love the ominous chase music that goes with it.

The album moves but it’s not very inspiring. I like it more than, say Blancmange and definitely more than I did when it came out. It’s a far cray from the Kimono days but it has a tiny spark of that Gleaming Spires sound. 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/pulling-rabbits-out-of-a-hat/279535097

The 1983 Listening Post - Sparks - In Outer Space

Sparks - In Outer Space

#254

1983

Sparks

In Outer Space

4.75 out 5

Highlights: 

Cool Places

Popularity

All You Ever Think About is Sex

Rockin’ Girls

I Wish I Looked a Little Better

I just re-listened to my entire Sparks catalog in October. I had a love affair with them in college, based on the sardonic and ironic wit of Angst in my Pants.

I didn’t give In Outer Space much of a chance back then. I wanted the rocking’ crunch of Angst and this was all so…synth-y.

I missed out back then because all of the wit is still there (“Rockin’ Girls”, “I Wish I Looked a Little Better”), the melodies are strong and the production is smart.

They did not sustain after this, however. In Outer Space is their attempt to vaunt into the top 40. It worked with the party track, “Cool Places” one of the best dance tracks of the era and the silly and delightful “Popularity” but after this Sparks would be in the wilderness for a long while. 

https://itunes.apple.com/us/album/in-outer-space/279523332

Listening Post: Sparks - Propaganda

Sparks - Propaganda - 1974

Like I said before. 1974. Crazy.
Obviously if this and the previous Sparks album were put out 15 years later, on CD, they would have been one offering, as Propaganda plays like Kimono My House part 2. But more of the same is terrific if what was before was as great as Kimono. Loony and more British than an LA band has a right to be. The Maels wear their influences on their sleeve and, while the production is just as keen as the previous record, the highlight is neither that nor the musicianship, its not even Russell's voice, all of which are stellar. It's the songwriting. Catchy as hell ("Reinforcements"), insightful ("At Home, At Work, At Play", "Never Turn Your Back on Mother Earth"), and just plain loopy ("B.C.", "Thanks But No Thanks", "Something for the Girl with Everything"). The Maels have captured the mid-decade confluence of dada-art and commercialism, albeit both are disguised within another. While it could use a little editing here and there ("Achoo" seems to go on forever, but maybe that's the point) Propaganda is another winner from Sparks.

Grade: B+
A Side: At Home At Work At Play, Never Turn Your Back on Mother Earth, Something for the Girl With Everything
BlindSide: Reinforcements, B.C., Achoo
DownSide: Don't Leave Me Alone With Her

Listening Post: Sparks - Kimono My House

Sparks- Kimono My House - 1974

Someday I'm going to get around to doing the Listening Post for the year 1974. A watershed year, I think. So much music really came into it's own: Metal, Glam, classic Rock, it was a grand time.
Sparks' 3rd album, the extraordinary merry-go-round of lunacy Kimono My House, which came out that year, is at once an epic of singular fun while at the same time picking up the mantle of Beatle glam and Queen sass and running wild.
Russell has embraced his anglophilia while brother Ron, writing epics of dubious nature (The exquisite epic glam waltz/lullaby "Falling in Love with Myself again" for example) and operatic genius ("This Town....") has truly found his voice.
The first side of Kimono is relentless. "Here in Heaven" is haunting and grandiose, worthy of Broadway. The breathless "Thank God it's not Christmas" calls to mind a 70s movie car chase with a vocal that calls to mind Freddie Mercury at his falsetto best.
The lost traveler opener of the second side, "Hasta Manana, Monsieur" is cute with it's obvious, cheeky, fish out of water lyrics, but it's not up to the par of the rest of the record. But it rights itself quickly with the bouncy Kinks pop of "Talent is an Asset", a terrific 3rd person tale of overindulgent parents and their prodigy. Reminds me of "Making Plans for Nigel" or any of the myriad songs in this idiom from English rock. It's quite brilliant. And on a record of great songs, it's a standout as is the equally jaunty "Complaints".
I could go on, song by song (well I guess I have) but the bottom line is that Kimono My House is one of the best top to bottom records of it's kind, an explosive yet bizarre (Sometimes macabre) glam pop rock relic of the mid-70s. If you think you know the era but you haven't heard this, you are not as educated as you think. It's a must.

Grade: A
ASide: This Town Ain't Big Enough for the both of Us, Amateur Hour, Talent is an Asset
BliindSide: Falling in Love With Myself Again, Here in Heaven, Thank God it's Not Christmas, Complaints, In My Family
Downside: Equator

Listening Post: Sparks - A Woofer in Tweeter's Clothing

Sparks - A Woofer in Tweeter's Clothing - 1972

Sparks gets much closer to perfecting their brand of glam and goof on their sophomore outing. Once again the record is front loaded as "Girl From Germany" is a splendid way to start but it's at about 3 songs in with the scattershot and epic "Nothing is Sacred" coupled with the string festooned "Here Comes Bob" that the album gets its fun on. "Moon Over Kentucky" completes the first side and shows the pathway to greatness that the forthcoming "This Town Ain't Big Enough for the Both of Us" would exemplify.
Side Two opens with a looney yet earnestly rocking version of Rogers and Hammerstein's "Do-Re-Mi" which would almost kill were it not for Russell's insistence on using that faux french accent which works later on "The Louvre" but is too distracting to ever convert anyone expecting mainstream pop to these guys. A denser and more rewarding record than their first, Sparks makes it clear that they are not for everyone but if you get them, they can be a real treat.

Grade B
A Side: Girl From Germany
BlindSide: Nothing is Sacred, Moon Over Kentucky
DownSide: Angus Desire, Whippings & Apologies

Listening Post: Sparks

Has anyone ever listened to every Sparks record? Well, I'm pretty sure the Mael brothers did but, other than them, I'm skeptical. So I'm about to change that.




Sparks/Halfnelson - Halfnelson - 1971

I bought Angst in my Pants after hearing "I Predict" on some New Wave stations and college radio. So, I assumed Sparks was a cheeky, humor band. When I saw Ron Mael's sardonic, determinedly non-musical presentation and his Chaplin/Hitler moustache I was convinced that this group spoke to my outside the mainstream aesthetic. I was pretty close. And when I would have the time and an extra couple bucks I would wander to a used record store (Most of the time it was Sounds in the East Village) and I would grab me an old Sparks record.
It took me a while to get my hands on the debut record and when I got it to my dorm and popped it on the turntable I was surprised to hear a very stripped down and bare sound, unlike the later glam gigantosaurs.
More surprising was the french accent lead singer Russel Mael adopted for much of the first side of the record. "Wonder Girl", the only single, and the only really memorable track, sounds like a french band trying to sound American. Or worse, an American band trying to sound like a French band trying to sound American.

Grade: C-
A Side: Wonder Girl
BlindSide: No More Mr. Nice Guys
DownSide: The rest.