The 1986 Listening Post - Voivod - Rrröööaaarrr

Voivod - Rrröööaaarrr

#93/1260

March 14 1986

Voivod

Rrröööaaarrr

Genre: Thrash

1 out of 5

No matter how many the number of umlauts, Voivod is just not good. This one sounds as much like someone having an attack of diarrhea and nausea at the same time and setting it to music. 

No one seems to be paying attention to each other and everyone just showed up to play whatever the hell they wanted and left after one take. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/rrr%C3%B6%C3%B6%C3%B6aaarrr/1141508812

The 1986 Listening Post - Obsession - Scarred for Life

Obsession - Scarred for Life

#92/1259

March 13 1986

Obsession

Scarred for Life

Genre: Screaming Metal

3.5 out of 5

Highlights:

Bang ‘em Till They Bleed (unfortunately titled track…I know)

There’s got to be a support group for high shrieking lead singers who were left with nothing to do and no place to go after the 80s were over. 

Where did these guys all come from? 

I blame Robert Plant. he’s the one they are all trying to emulate, no? First him then David Coverdale and then Bruce Dickinson and Die and then…poof. All gone. 

Sure, I bet there’s nostalgia concerts and “Monsters of Metal” and shit but, I don’t see these guys doing cruises or the like. 

Michael Vescera has the chops. A voice that is perfect for this.
Here’s a tidbit: These guys provided the songs for the Sleepaway Camp sequels. The first Sleepaway Camp has one of my favorite lines in the history of film: When Jonathan Tierstenresponds to “eat shit and die, Ricky!” with “Eat shit and live!”

I never forgot that line and was too star struck to ask him about it when it turned out he was in my dorm at NYU. I never saw him again after orientation at Brittany Hall. But, that moment of awe was struck in my brain forever. 

Eat shit and live, bro!

https://music.apple.com/us/album/scarred-for-life/1456239876

The 1986 Listening Post - Robert Tepper - No Easy Way Out

Robert Tepper - No Easy Way Out

#91/1258

March 13 1986

Robert Tepper

No Easy way Out

Genre: TV Theme Show Rock

2.25 out of 5

I want to like this kind of stuff but it’s just not in me. I mean the world has one John Parr. We don’t need any others. Hell, I’m not sure we really needed that one. This is that Bryan Adams lane. John Mellencamp’s. 

This is the stuff of 90s tv show theme songs. “Restless World” sounds at once like a rip off of “St. Elmo’s Fire (Man in Motion)” and also, like it could be the theme song to Party of Five. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/no-easy-way-out/336800640

The 1986 Listening Post - Ministry - Twitch

Ministry - Twitch

#90/1257

March 12 1986

Ministry

Twitch

Genre: Industrial

3.75 out of 5

Highlights:

Just Like You

My Possession

This is nothing like the last Ministry album. Is this the sound they would be known for? Is this the first commercial industrial album? I don’t remember hearing one that sounded like it belonged on a disco floor before. Maybe I’m wrong but I think this is a nexus point for that sound. You just know that these guys heard Big Black and were moved by that thing. 

Anyways, I’ll be honest, I got a bunch of work done while it was on. So, there’s that. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/twitch/302136278

The 1986 Listening Post - Eric Johnson - Tones

Eric Johnson - Tones

#89/1256

March 12 1986

Eric Johnson

Tones

Genre: (Mostly) Instrumental Rock

3.5 out of 5

Highlights:

Zap

Who is Eric Johnson? 

No, I mean it. Who is this guy? His music is casual, beach combing Malibu rock. Lyrics and melodies hung on excuses for him to solo. He’s got the talent...much of this feels like a more skilled Christopher Cross. 

There are a lot of fantastic guitar players out there and Johnson seems to be up in that pantheon. It takes a while to really get there, though, but “Zap” is great. There’s is nothing else like it on the album, though. It’s a thing unto itself and feels like it should be the launching point, not the exception. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/tones/357999889

The 1986 Listening Post - Neil Diamond - Headed for the Future

Neil Diamond - Headed for the Future

#88/1255

March 11 1986

Neil Diamond

Headed for the Future

Genre: Pop Rock…?

0.5 out of 5

Oh, dear. Remember when I talked about artists that looked at what was going on in the world and started to write albums that reflected their worldview? (See Jackson Browne)

Neil wants in on that. 

Only his approach is more “Uncool Uncle”. The synths…the over-wrought lyrics coupled with Schmaltz Rock vocals…it’s all in here. And it’s…not good. 

It’s not even “Turn on your heart light” bad. It’s just objectively terrible. 

And, yes, I listened to the whole thing. I hate myself just that much. 

And now Neil is going to get a royalty check for streaming for, like, $.00000001 cent and he’s gonna be like, “Who the heck listened to that thing?!”.

https://music.apple.com/us/album/headed-for-the-future/1443211103

The 1986 Listening Post - Bourgeois Tagg - Bourgeois Tagg

Bourgeois Tagg - Bourgeois Tagg

#87/1254

March 3 1986

Bourgeois Tagg

Bourgeois Tagg

Genre: New Wave

3.25 out of 5

Highlights:

Heart of Darkness 

Man…remember when we were all into Bourgeois Tagg and we would greet each other with knowing sinks and refer to ourselves as “Taggies”? Not “Taggers” cuz fuck that noise. We didn’t care that it wasn’t a forward moving descriptor, it made us feel good when we all dance walked in jagged steps as we tried to emulate what it would like to look like 2 dimensional Picasso paintings.

Oh, youth. 

Who the fuck is Bourgeois Tagg????

This record is what you get when you give competent musicians studio time but ONLY if they are allowed to perfectly recreate the cliche of what everyone thinks 80s music is supposed to sound like. 

Take every band you liked in the 70s and remember what they sounded like when they tried to sound current in the mid-80s and that’s this record. 

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITmnFi3MX4U&list=PLBJ7ztNazTVDywbH7kCVKRQDABAxP4ggk

The 1986 Listening Post - Ted Nugent - Little Miss Dangerous

Ted Nugent - Little Miss Dangerous

#86/1253

March 3 1986

Ted Nugent

Little Miss Dangerous

Genre: Radio Metal

2.75 out of 5

Highlights:

Little Red Book

Painkiller

I used to drive a 1962 Chevy Bel Air. The Year was 1983. It was my cousin’s grandfather’s car. I bought it for $75. It would stall out at stop lights because the filler w was so clogged and I couldn’t afford to get a new one or something. 

I had a boom box that I would place on the floor and blare home made mix tapes of stuff I recorded of the radio. 

Some of it was the radio Metal of the day like Billy Squier. And Toto, which isn’t metal but I liked it. 

I don’t know how I was fortunate enough to have avoided the Nuge. 

All of these songs sound like leftovers from a Motley Crue record. Except “Crazy Ladies” which is such a blatant rip-off off “Hot For Teacher” Ted should be ashamed. 

I will say the Partridge Family era David Cassidy sounding “Little Red Book” was a neat little surprise. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/little-miss-dangerous/1452956864

The 1986 Listening Post - Death of Samantha - Strungout on Jargon

Death of Samantha - Strungout on Jargon

#85/1252

March 1 1986

Death of Samantha

Strungout On Jargon

Genre: Indie

3.5 out of 5

Highlights:

Simple As That

Conviction

Grapeland (I’m Getting Sick)

I hear Joy Division. Do you? I hear Sonic Youth as well. I also hear…King Missile…? 

I hear…

the 90s. 

“Simple as That” is the sound of change.

This whole DIY record is nothing great but it’s also fantastic. I keep coming back to this: The 80s were a time when everything changed and anything went. Get in a studio and bash out something. Get on stage and make some noise. The Sex Pistols proved that musical talent didn’t matter, in fact, it was a detriment to the roots of rock and roll. And Radiohead would soon crystallize the sentiment with “Anyone Can Play Guitar”. 

This is the nexus of those sentiments. 

I thought this was just the right amount of weirdness and fun. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhQ01WdqT9E

The 1986 Listening Post - Metallica - Master of Puppets

Metallica - Master of Puppets

#84/1251

March 3 1986

Metallica

Master of Puppets

Genre: Thrash Metal

4.5 out of 5

Highlights:

Master of Puppets

Disposable Heroes

Damage, Inc

In early 1988 I was living in a basement apartment off Sunset Blvd kitty corner from Tower Records. The payphone at Tower was my main source of communication with the outside world for the first few weeks while we got our telephone line installed. Above us was a psychiatrists office. We had no furniture. 

I slept on an inflatable air mattress and my roommate had our only TV. I was lucky if I got to watch reruns of Charlie’s Angels at 3 in the afternoon before I caught the bus to my telemarketing job at Factor Fox in Santa Monica. 

One day, after calling home from the payphone, I was wandering around Tower and grabbed a copy of the LA Weekly and, laying on the floor of the main room of this dwelling (the only place to actually sit was a giant chair I fashioned out of milk crates), popped on the Residents compilation, “Hell!” and opened the Weekly. 

There was an article about a burgeoning and explosive new music form that was bubbling up from the underbelly of metal. It was being led by an aptly named group called Metallica. I can not find that article in any archives but I remember it well. Mostly because I thought, “well, that doesn’t interest me but I’m sure my metal head friends would love it.” And I moved on.

Of course, I and everyone else would get caught up in the Metallica swirl a few years later with the black album but that was a lifetime away. 

All this to say: I never listened to Master of Puppets. 

Until today. 

It opens in the same way, with a tasteful acoustic guitar that belies what’s coming. And I’m okay with that trick again, since this is the first major label release and new audiences might not have heard that. 

Let’s just take a moment to realize that this album came out 33 years ago at this writing. When it came out “Rock and Roll” was not yet 33. Elvis was just 30 years before this. That boggles my mind. That Master of Puppets is older now than “Blue Suede Shoes” was when it came out…just weird, man.

Wow. 

Just…

Wow. 

But I’m gonna say this (and probably get killed for it): I liked Ride the Lightning more. I feel like it’s assault was more devastating and immediate. This is gigantic and great, but that was more of a surprise. 

https://music.apple.com/us/album/master-of-puppets-remastered-deluxe-box-set/1275819392